We Don’t Have the Time Our Parents Did. Really?

I recently talked to a neighbor about his surprise over the variety of activities I do, like skiing, boating, home improvements, etc. in addition to working and being a parent. He asked how I knew and did so much. I responded that, like my parents, if I did not know something I could learn it, and he could too. He responded, “I just do not have the time my parents did.”

As far as I know a minute, an hour, a day, a week, a year are all the same length today as it was fifty years ago. (Actually, we have a bit more time due to the slowing of the earth, but at 1.7 milliseconds per century it holds no practical value.)

The problem is not that we do not have the time our parents did, we just have more things to fill it with. It is our choices, not the length of the day, that has altered the amount of “time” we have. Technology provides us with both the capacity for extensive learning and almost limitless entertainment choices.

Unfortunately, the ease of grabbing an entertainment fix and obsessively engaging in risk free relationships through social media seems to win out with most people. This is understandable. Posting on Facebook about the latest YouTube fail, while your partner plays Bejeweled and your child plays Angry Birds holds much less relationship risk that discussing home finances with your spouse or learning, and then dealing with, the fact your daughter is the victim of the school yard bully. However, it is detrimental to both our relationships and our society.

In my youth, T.V. was limited, most stores closed early and on Sundays, and video games, until we got an Atari, were played out of the house. If you were home and were bored your choices were to interact with family, friends, and neighbors, help with the house, read a book, listen to music, or play with your toys. (For my Father, “playing with toys included restoring old cars and working on home improvement projects.)

This meant that creativity fostered, we knew our neighbors, conversation abounded, intellects increased, and productivity reigned. Sure, we still time silently entranced by the boob tube, but it was the exception and not the rule.

So I challenge you, for one week: lock out all your TV channels except for local broadcast stations, put away your tablets, computers, and video games, use your phone only for emergencies, turn off your internet connection. You will be amazed at how much time you have for what is truly important in life.

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